Dear Santa ~

Thanksgiving has gone by,a tree in every window,dressed in Reds and silver, greens and golds.

Every child is jotting down their lists In hopes that you will bring them just what they want.

Boy and girl alike lining up to sit upon your knee ,that was once me, do you remember?

Several years I did not know what I want, many I did not care what you brought for me. 

I have not asked for any thing for years now, been fine with what I have. Yes there has been a few wishes. I wished for a boyfriend when I was 18, got just that, a boyfriend that taught me I did not need a boyfriend to see me through, I could make it on my own. I wished for my dad to show me that he still believed, and then he bore his testimony to me after receiving the box of gifts on our door step when times were so hard. I have a few wishes left. At first my wish for this Christmas was to find my true love, But what is another year? There is some thing more important for this year. This year I wish to see all my family perfectly happy, for one day. No worry, no thought of where the next rent payment will come from. No anger, no grudges held towards another. No pain, Forget all the loss. No stress, no wondering minds of how we will survive. Let us all turn our minds to whose birthday it is. Let Us remember that each year no matter how hard the world is that flowers still bloom in the tender care of our lord. That is my Christmas Wish.Complete happiness and peace with in my family this Christmas. 

So Santa my friend, Forget all the fancy things that you thought of bringing me, Forget my cry to find love. I want those I love to feel the love, the love of Christ and the peace that comes with it. 

Your forever friend ~ Bellah 

Can I just say wow!

I love this guy!!

Pie!!!

It is the month of pie!! And I am ready to start looking up and sharing recipes!!!

I have tried this one before and I liked it its perfect for those that like a little tart and sweet.

Pink Lemonade Pie



Ingredients 
1 (14 ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
1 (6 ounce) can frozen pink lemonade concentrate, thawed
1 (8 ounce) container of whipped topping
2 (8 inch) prepared Graham cracker crusts

Directions 
In a large bowl , mix together sweetened condensed mil and lemonade concentrate. Fold in whipped topping. Pour into pie crusts. Refrigerate until completely chilled.

Mint Chocolate chip Ice-cream Pie! 



2 pints mint chocolate chip ice cream, slightly softened
1 package (6 ounces) ready-to-use chocolate-flavored pie crust
1 1/4 cups crushed chocolate- covered mint cookies
1 cup chocolate fudge topping



Spread 1 pint of the ice cream in pie crust. Sprinkle 1 cup of the crushed over ice cream. Cover and freeze 1 hour Spread remaining pint of ice cream over cookies. cover and freeze for about 3 hours til firm.
Top with Fudge and sprinkle with cookies.


This is a pie!!?? 



   

When will my life begin?!!

What is it inside of a girl that makes her tear up and think " I Want that" when she sees her friends announcing a baby? I am so ever happy for my dear friends who are expecting. I just cant help sitting here wishing I was in the same boat. I feel ready to get married be a wife and then a mother, but the lord must not think I am ready for that yet, but oh how i love the thought of settling down and starting a family. Oh don't for a moment think that it does not scare me cause it does. I mean I am fearful just to fall in love again let alone marry and have lil Bellahs. There is always that chance that I wont know  what I am doing when it comes to raising a family. I mean I still ask my mom about how to do the simplest of things at times. I have never paid rent other than dorms. I have not had to worry about bills or really even being in a long lasting relationship. I find it amazing when a friend stays by my side, how will it be to forever have some one by my side that loves me and will never leave. I just know that I want to be married and its not a feeling that is going to go away. It is always on my mind, perhaps I have just gone crazy haha. If so what is normal?
Well now that I have gone on and on about that I know what is in need before I can move on to that. I need to start dating so that I may meet that young man who is going to sweep me off my feet and marry me. That is the hard part finding a guy willing to chase me. I don't mean to run, its just I fear I will fall for them and they will only see me as "just that one girl" or " just a friend" and then when a guy seems to like me I still cant let my self just give in, I like freak out or some thing and want to hide. If there is no guy that wont give  up when I end up abit hard to get then I am doomed to be, not the cat or dog lady, But the plant or herb lady. I will forever be growing my herbs and roses and bamboo. The might as well call me a greenwitch. Sigh.
I have been doing better about going on dates, after a year of not going on one date I went on another date with Sam to the snow homecoming. Funny thing is the last date before that date with him was with him almost a year ago to the day. Sigh perhaps that's not so funny but more on the lines of pathetic. Tho I did kinda go on another ( I think I can call it a date) Date with Sam later that week, at least we hung out one on one and got to know each other slightly better. Than I think I went on a date the other day. Well Ya It was a Date, My friend Kendra set us up and it went quite well, i think haha. He talked to me on the phone before I went on my trip and had asked if I wanted to go get lunch with him or something and well when I got back I sent him a text to let him know I was back and he set up a time for us to go get an ice cream. We talked and seemed to get along just fine. And I think by him asking me if I liked movies and then saying we would have to go to a movie some time he was setting up a 2nd date. I am so naive when it comes to dating. I have only had like friends who decide "oh lets be girlfriend boyfriend" or " Follow me around til I give in and say I will date them and then the next thing I know we are boyfriend and girlfriend" I guess I have never had some one set up a 2nd date with me before... just hung out with me til we became close enough to say we are dating. Its Kinda nice tho. Its mature and not so wishy washy games. Not a guy just dating you so he can say you are his girlfriend. No don't get me wrong I am not dating any one right now not in a steady way! so no one start going around saying so. I will tell you If I ever get into a steady relationship. ( That is if I don't die of shock before I can tell any one since by the rate it has been going for the last .... Year and a half... I cant believe its been that long already) ( hope you can make since out of that cause I barely can.
I really can not believe its been a year and a half. It has felt so short and so long all together. Time is such a funny thing. And yes it still hurts but you know what I am doing good, I am dating again! That is big to me!
Perhaps that is the reason I am so afraid of falling in love and marriage, Because I fear losing it again. Could I live through that again?... I want it so bad, but I don't want to lose it. Is that selfish of me? Other girls get to find love get married, have children and spend the rest of their lives raising children so is it selfish of me to want the same? I don't think it is. I am not asking to be married to no wealthy drop dead handsome guy, an average guy will be just fine for me.
Well here I am rattling on like I have all the time in the world when I need to wake up early and my battery is low with the plug in the other room. Hope some one can make abit of since out of my ramblings and perhaps even learn some thing from them.

Fall time treats

I taught you how to make acorns into pumpkins for Halloween now i will teach you to make Acorns
.

Ingredients
Chocolate Frosting or Peanut Butter
Donuts
Crumbled Toffee
Pretzel
Instructions
Frost a third or so of a plain or glazed doughnut hole with chocolate frosting or peanut butter.
Roll the frosted top in crumbled toffee (look for it in the baking section of grocery stores), then add a small piece of a pretzel for the stem


Ingredients
Cupcake batter
Red frosting
Red sugar sprinkles
Tootsie Roll Midgees
Green Tootsie Fruit Roll
White frosting
Instructions
 Mix your favorite cupcake batter and divide it evenly among cupcake wells lined with red paper or silicone cups (see Tip below), filling each one about three-quarters full. Bake the cupcakes according to the recipe directions and let them cool.
Carve a shallow, dime-size well in the top of each cupcake, then cover the tops with red frosting and coat them with red sugar sprinkles. Mold a small piece of a Tootsie Roll Midgee into a stem shape. Form a leaf from a small piece of green Tootsie Fruit Roll, pinch it against the stem, then insert the stem into the cupcake.
To make a bitten apple, spoon a small well from the side of the cupcake and line it with white frosting. Press tiny bits of Tootsie Roll Midgee in place for seeds.

Thankful for my Voice

I am thankful for my lovely voice that I have been given. Some times I can just feel it growing and becomeing a trained tuned interment and I love it! Thank you lord for giving my that Beauty!

To My Dream Guy

         Someday we will be in love, you and I. I am not sure I know you yet, but some day somewhere we will discover each other. Someday we will know we are meant to be together forever. That day may be near or far but it will come. I wonder what you look like, and what thinks you like to do, and what it is that will make me fall in love with you when that day comes.
       Dream Guy, I am not Interested in the guy that spends all his time lifting weights or showing off driving way too fast. I am not interested in the guy who changes his standards to fit those he is with, the guy that can't see the wrong in the occasional cigarette or drink. I am not looking for you at Bars and shady parties, not among the group of guys using the Lords name in vain. I know you are not there.
        I have been learning how to love. I have dated a few guys some of them letting me fall hard and others  leaving me to cry. I have found many of the wrong ones, But I keep looking for you. The lord has promised me that you will be a worthy Priesthood holder and I am trying my best to be worthy to marry you in the temple. I dream of that day when we will kneel by the alter.
        Neither of us are perfect. Yet we will love each other for what and who we are. And when we don't see eye to eye we shall kneel hand in hand and seek the inspiration of our father.
         There will not be many tomorrows till we find each other and I am waiting anxiously for that day.
Remember that I am here waiting for you and stay true. Until we meet sweet dreams and keep holding on.
                                           ~Your future Wife~
                                                                  Bellah

Thankful

So I wanted to write some thing I am thankful for each day of November but I was so busy on my trip to visit all my friends and that, that I did not really write at all in the last two weeks. so it now being the 12th I will write 12 things that I have been very thankful for in the last 12 days.

Good Weather.
      ~ Even though we were told that a bad storm was suppose to hit today as we were traveling home, we made it home safely with only a few minutes of soft snow fall.

A Warm sleeping Bag
      ~ Alveda and I ended up sleeping in the car last night for I lacked the planning in one night of where we were going to stay. It was not that bad really I could not lay my seat back very far but I had a nice warm sleeping bag to keep me from the bitter cold. It was kind of lovely to wake up to raining down leaves. If it had not been for us traveling I would have said that watching the storm roll in was lovely as well.

My friends
      ~ I am sure that at one point I will list some of my friends separately but this is a general list and I was very thankful for the friends I was able to see these last two weeks. I love them very much and shall always hold them close. It was hard to say goodbye to them once again.

My Uncle Jody
      ~ I love him very much. His calm manner when his kids are acting up and his ability to smile so brightly in every thing is wonderful. I want to be like that as well.

Alveda
      ~ Going on a trip with her was wonderful! I had so much fun with her. I know it would not have been the same with out my best friend by my side.

Luck.
     ~ Playing at an arcade was so much fun between the two of us Alveda and I won 3 jackpots and had 2625 tickets in the end!

Getting lost with dear friends.
       ~ Marci, Alveda and I had a great Indiana Jones Adventure bouncing around in her jeep as we tried to find our destination and will always remember that night for the fact of almost backing up into a ditch and getting lost.

Orange Julias
     ~ I love the smoothies there!! I think we had one pretty much every day that we could!

Dancing.
      ~ Being able to go to 4 dances was amazing. The Halloween dance was lots of fun. Western swing was a blast hanging out with Tall Paul. And I really enjoyed the oppertuninty to go on another date with Sam to homecoming.( Even if I had a jealous guy staring at me across the dance floor all night) and then the Tute dance that I went to just last night was most amazing I met some great people and was able to dance with many of my friends and really I was just in a glowing mood last night.

Malls
    ~ Alveda and I spent lots of time looking around malls and I had fun Christmas shopping in the meantime.

Those that let us crash for a night or two at there places
    ~ There would have been alot more nights of Alveda and I sleeping in the car if it was not for you great people.

Texting
      ~ Its the best way for me to make all the plans that I needed to make over the last two weeks lol

Dont worry if you are not on this small list  I am pretty sure at one time you may end up in this blog for I am thankful for every one!
Well I best call it a night... I have not slept much these last two weeks And I am excited to be back in my own bed!!!!

Somebodies everything.

I want to be some ones every thing. Tonight I went to western swing it used to be my favorite thing to do here at snow. I kinda met the guy there that had called me a dream there. He was very sweet to me like always but though I think the world of him and even at times he can make me blush and my world spin softly I can never really see him as the one I am meant to be with.

Sometimes you don’t need a goal in life, you don’t need to know the big picture, you just need to know what you’re going to do next....


I sat there watching my best friend dance with some guy and then spend most of the night talking with this other guy and well I  can just imagine me helping her with a long elegant wedding dress and a light flowing vale. She would have me dressed in a light blue-green dress as her maid of honor. Yes I can see her married before me. I am ok with that but I want some one to love me. I see these couples that I have always seen together and are just meant for each other. To each other they are the world. I want that. I want to know that no matter what some one is going to love me. I want to be able to see a future with some one. Right now I feel like I am stuck in a loop of nothing.

 Being here with those my age again I have seen that there is still hope for me. Every day some one is meeting their someone and some day I am going to run smack into mine or perhaps I have already met him.
But like I was saying but I am kinda tired so I am randomly rambling. I want to be somebodies everything! I am not trying to be self centered or any thing like that. I just want that feeling of being some thing more than just a girl.

November

Now that Halloween has came and gone it is time to start posting about some thing new. Fall still around us and thanksgiving is just around the corner. So this will be my last post on Halloween other than perhaps posting photos of the dance.
Notes on last night:
Dancing again was so much fun. My friends made me join the costume contest for the pumpkin Queen. I did not win but it was still fun. I was a masked princess and it was hard for some to tell who I was. I surprised one of my friends and he said it was like he was dreaming that I had came back. Its nice to have a guy say you are like a dream. Yes there are guys here!! Ones that I can talk to with almost ease!! It is so nice to see all my friends. I wish I could stay here forever!

SO during November til Thanksgiving I wish to write about things I am thankful for. Keep Reading to see what I am thankful for! Oh and of course I will keep up with fun Fall Crafts and Recipes that I find!!