Humbling

Why when I think I have life figured out things tumble? I had hoped that this weekend I would be starting mission papers that things would start going for me. I have been freaking out because I am not moving forward at all. Well perhaps I was moving towards some thing after all. All these months there has been one person I have been fighting not to contact. I was so full of pride saying "No that would only ruin all my work at not talking to him" Well I was a full. Who am I to take some one out of my life? Some one God worked so hard to place in my life and who God fought so hard to keep us together till the end and then me believing every thing every one else told me about him, every assumption I had of him. He is not as I thought. I thought I had lost him. It was as if he had passed away of some thing. Then tonight as my heart felt that it would cave in I only wanted to talk to him. I fought so hard to not do so. Then I did. And of course he Emailed me back exactly what I needed to hear. I bawled with relief. How on earth did he get back into my life? Well no matter ... I missed him.

The Perfect words for the moment 

" Bellah Bellah Bellah! I wish you had a nice place there in Kanab like the Manti temple, that you could go to and just think. Never forget that you're a daughter of God and that he loves you. It NEVER NEVER  matters what others think about you, whether its good or bad. The only ones you should worry about right now, are you and your Heavenly Father. He cares about you and wants you to be happy. He wants you to be successful. I learned something this weekend, when we pray, its not that we're asking for a miracle exactly, its us simply acting, and asking Father for blessings that He already has in store for you! Don't give up! You are the strongest woman I know!!! I MEAN IT! Pray daily, pray always, it is impossible to pray too much!"